Growing Pains.

Hello. I know those who are reading this right now, are anxious to know how I am doing. Well I made it friends. I have been living in Germany for almost a month and I can't believe where the time has gone. I have been just soaking this time in and it feels surreal. It is finally sinking in that this is my home for the next 6 months. Germany has a sense of peace and home feel for me. It is hard to explain that this place feels like home but I think it is because I am supposed to be here. God has placed me here. Therefore, I feel peace. I have been learning so much about my relationship it is crazy. I want to continue to learn more but it is hard to fully soak in all the information.

                                       

This is my life right now. I know that it is important to be here and I know my life will be changed for the better because of this year. However, I still ache to be at home studying nursing and seeing all things familiar. I miss you all. I keep this hope knowing that the growing pains I feel is an important part of my life and will only further my life as a child of God.

Home.

Over the past year, I have constantly been asking myself the question of what is home? I think over the course of the last year I have come to a conclusion that home is where there is community. I have found it so difficult to find myself feeling at home in a place where there is little human interaction. This idea that community is home has let me persevere. Continuing to have friends and a church family to support the journey that I am on has been giving me hope and peace. My physical house is forever changing but the emotional home I have built for myself is growing.

My journey over the past year has been one of trials but also great joy and it is because of the community that I find my abode. This film series is a way for you, friends and family, to stay connected. I ask that you join me on this faith journey. Wherever it may take us.

Here's a little sneak peak of what is to come.

Loneliness: The Aftermath of Urbanization?

Metropolitan. Full of loud sounds, fascinating people, and beautiful architecture. This place of wonderful chaos is one place I thought I would feel the least amount of loneliness. However, in this fast paced city I find myself looking at only strangers. Unidentifiable people who are going about their lives as much as the next person. Yet, I feel there is no interconnecting web between my life and any of these strangers. No recognizable regular customers from work, or familiar faces from the grocery store. There is a lack of community in my little bubble of Winnipeg. Even though it is refreshing to go down the street and know that no one knows your family, where you were born, or what you have experienced in life, I still feel a sense of detachment from my own self because of it. We are designed to be in fellowship with one another and this lack of attachment to others has left me feeling an imbalance in my veins. I have been challenged this past week with unimaginable, sad news from a friend. It took me a week just to begin to process this information because I have been physically alone. I am truly understanding the importance of these "creatures" called humans. These beautiful people that God has created to live in harmony with one another. I feel trapped in such a vast province because of this distancing from people. 20th street is Saskatoon represents the kind of community I crave. People walk down the street with their heads carried high giving a slight smile to new friends they met on the street opposed to the followed manner of most "urbanites" with their heads held low trying not to make contact with the fellow pedestrian. They eat at one table, go to smudging ceremonies with one another, sit at the local park bench and "people watch" together. This is what fellowship is. It's living together with one another. I am becoming more thankful for the people and the home I have in my life. Even though these are times of sadness and loneliness,  I am beginning to find hope in knowing that it only takes a grin on the street, or a gentle "hello" to get closer to feeling whole.

Little things.

 

I have realized a lot of things this summer. One revelation I have made is that I am not made for urban life. I love city living but I miss the fields, lakes, and smells of the country. I am so very glad my beautiful friend could show me her home this weekend. Altona is beautiful. I am so very happy and content dreaming about the future with my kindred spirit in the fields of Manitoba. I thank God for these moments. 

Invisible Mommies.

Today is the day to remember those women who have sacrificed everything to raise their children. It's the day that children bring burnt toast and warm milk to their mother's nightstand. It's the day where children honour their mothers for all that they have done to raise them. There is this visible interaction between children and mothers today. However, I can't help to think,  on this day, so many mothers who ache to eat burnt toast and drink warm milk. They ache to be exhausted, holding their crying baby in their arms. And they ache to wake up at 5 am to the sound of children's laughter. These are the women that are invisible on this day. I want to say thank-you to these mommies who have babies in heaven. You have put up with the awkward greetings today, the children all around you who hugging their mommies, and the lack of cards and gifts given to you. I want to say that you are a mom and you are loved. Thank-you to the mommies who are missing a part of their family today. You shouldn't be invisible because even though you don't hold that one precious part of your family in your arms, the scent of mother for that child fills your entire being. I want to say to you because I know if I was in your shoes, I would want those words said to me.

Blessed.

Being thankful. A concept we are taught at such a young age and are told to practice but I find it so hard. Why do the hard things seem to mask all the blessings in my life? I have been thinking about this and realizing that being thankful is a choice. It's my responsibility to be thankful. I have the choice to dwell on the negative or look to the good in life. My desire is to continually find the positive in life yet why is it so hard to achieve?

I went to my auntie and uncle's cottage this weekend and as I took a walk on the trails, I thought about everything that I had. I have so much. I have so much that has been handed to me, so much to give, and yet I don't. I think this is a goal I need to make. A goal to give. I think then I can I will find the choice to be thankful. It's easy to say I'll just give back when I'm not a college student anymore or I'll just give back when I have a full time job but it starts today. It's journey to thankfulness starts with giving back today. 

I hope that this gives you a little inspiration for how you can begin to be thankful again.

DIY Painted Globe

A little sunday afternoon crafting was needed. I have made it a goal to have a rest day this semester so, I decided to make my roommates' birthday gift and thought I would share it with you, my friends.

What you will need is a globe, paint and a paintbrush. Then I just painted the globe with my white paint before putting my base coat on. 

Then I put this light purple colour on as a base. But after this the rest is up to your imagination. I decided to put a quote from C.S. Lewis on mine, but the choices are endless. 

                     

Take a day to rest and have fun crafting.