Loneliness: The Aftermath of Urbanization?

Metropolitan. Full of loud sounds, fascinating people, and beautiful architecture. This place of wonderful chaos is one place I thought I would feel the least amount of loneliness. However, in this fast paced city I find myself looking at only strangers. Unidentifiable people who are going about their lives as much as the next person. Yet, I feel there is no interconnecting web between my life and any of these strangers. No recognizable regular customers from work, or familiar faces from the grocery store. There is a lack of community in my little bubble of Winnipeg. Even though it is refreshing to go down the street and know that no one knows your family, where you were born, or what you have experienced in life, I still feel a sense of detachment from my own self because of it. We are designed to be in fellowship with one another and this lack of attachment to others has left me feeling an imbalance in my veins. I have been challenged this past week with unimaginable, sad news from a friend. It took me a week just to begin to process this information because I have been physically alone. I am truly understanding the importance of these "creatures" called humans. These beautiful people that God has created to live in harmony with one another. I feel trapped in such a vast province because of this distancing from people. 20th street is Saskatoon represents the kind of community I crave. People walk down the street with their heads carried high giving a slight smile to new friends they met on the street opposed to the followed manner of most "urbanites" with their heads held low trying not to make contact with the fellow pedestrian. They eat at one table, go to smudging ceremonies with one another, sit at the local park bench and "people watch" together. This is what fellowship is. It's living together with one another. I am becoming more thankful for the people and the home I have in my life. Even though these are times of sadness and loneliness,  I am beginning to find hope in knowing that it only takes a grin on the street, or a gentle "hello" to get closer to feeling whole.

Little things.

 

I have realized a lot of things this summer. One revelation I have made is that I am not made for urban life. I love city living but I miss the fields, lakes, and smells of the country. I am so very glad my beautiful friend could show me her home this weekend. Altona is beautiful. I am so very happy and content dreaming about the future with my kindred spirit in the fields of Manitoba. I thank God for these moments.